Why We Need Empathy
It should be pretty easy to see that the United States is in rough shape at the moment. I’m not just referring to politics, although…yikes. You know what, I think we could use a break from discussing current events—a break from doomscrolling and mourning and unrelenting fear. We need to remember that we’re all human beings with unique experiences and ways of seeing the world. We need to recognize each other’s struggles. We need empathy. Lots of it.
If you’re anything like me, you feel a lot. For family, for friends, even for strangers you see sitting stoically on a park bench or who you can clearly see are going through something. You can put yourself in their shoes in one way or another and appreciate what you believe they may be going through. Almost always, I become melancholy when someone around me does. I stop smiling the moment they do, and can recognize all the times I felt the same way. I’m not trying to act like I’m such a perfect kind person who can perfectly read everyone’s mind––I myself have plenty of issues. But as I’ve been reflecting recently, I’ve noticed that overall, we have appeared to become less empathetic and perhaps more self-centered. As someone who considers myself a casual empath, I have found this alarming. I believe that empathy has the power to change the world for the better, and that this trait isn’t appreciated enough.
To quickly clarify, empathy is often confused with sympathy, but they are not the same. Sympathy is like a less personal form of empathy––it’s a feeling of concern or pity. There is nothing wrong with feeling sympathy rather than empathy, depending on the situation, but they should be considered two different emotional responses.
Empathy is often overlooked in society as being “weak”...more bluntly, “feminine.” The whole concept of toxic masculinity and anyone who falls into that category scoffs at the idea of compassion and understanding someone’s point of view on a personal level. However, in my opinion, how someone feels about empathy is usually very telling of that person’s character. Empathy makes character. This may be unpopular, but to me, a trait that is found in practically all decent people is empathy and the ability to connect with others in a meaningful way. Of course, different people show empathy in different ways––some with words, some with actions, some with silence. But the key is that they exhibit empathy in some form.
Being empathetic doesn’t mean you’re weak in any way––in fact, it can be a sign of strength (much like other traditionally “feminine” traits”). It means you are in touch with your feelings and have the capacity to relate those feelings to those outside yourself. This can lead to success in your social life, work life, and beyond by thinking about things through different lenses and being able to read a room. Empathy can strengthen relationships by making others feel understood and respected. I know from experience that being around someone empathetic and able to relate to me in some way in turn makes me feel more connected to that person, leading to a bond that may not have otherwise been formed.
Practicing empathy isn’t as hard as you think it is if you aren’t naturally inclined to practice it daily––which doesn’t make you a bad person, especially if you aren’t in a circumstance that warrants it. Actively listening when others speak is a great start, especially when they share a different perspective or life experience from you. Keeping an open mind is also important, as it allows you to fully appreciate what the other person is saying without preconceived biases getting in the way. Don’t try to deny you have biases or prejudice, either; all of us do in one way or another, even if we don’t want to admit it. That’s just part of being human. The key is to try to find a common ground of connection. In turn, it is also important for you to share when it feels right. Empathy is not a one-way street, after all, and by being open about your feelings, you allow others to be open as well, which often leads to mutual understanding of some sort. If nothing else, you can be respectful to others when they share a part of themselves, because, if you’re anything like me, you would want them to do the same for you.
In an age where emotional self-sufficiency and self-reliance seem to be on the rise in all sectors of society, it is crucial we examine the importance of empathy and caring about others. Maybe we should all collectively rewatch Inside Out (2015) to remember what displaying empathy can be. Or better yet, just try to be a good person. It might seem broad, but empathy is the first step. We could all use a large dose of it these days.
