EXCLUSIVE INTERVIEW: Susanna Cappellaro On Her Documentary, My Husband, The Cyborg

Susanna Cappellaro holding a phone next to Scott Cohen, who is blindfolded.

My Husband, the Cyborg is a documentary by Susanna Cappellaro, journalist and actress, that follows her husband, Scott Cohen, as he integrates technological devices into his body to heighten his awareness of the world around him. At first, Mrs. Cappellaro was in disbelief, so she started making the film for herself, hoping to make sense of it all. But as she continued filming, she realized there was a compelling story to tell. The film comes out today on Apple TV, Amazon, Google Play, and Peacock.

To start off can you explain what exactly it means for your husband to become a cyborg? 

It’s very simple. It’s not really about body modification but about mind modification by attaching this device called the North Sense on his chest. He experienced a different perception of the world because he added an extra sense. In this case the sense of orientation. Every time he faced north the magnet buzzed. Giving him a feeling of where he stood on the planet. He said he felt more connected to the planet.

Mrs. Cappellaro described an instance when her husband was in the tube (Mrs. Cappellaro and Mr. Cohen live in London!) the device buzzed, and suddenly underground, he knew where north, south, east, and west were. He has an idea of the direction of his home and where his parents live. This device creates a mental map of his life, offering him a deeper connection to the world around him.

What was your initial reaction?

What? What’s a cyborg? *Mrs. Cappellaro reenacts her reaction, her face filled with disbelief* I didn’t know anything. I imagine that anyone who is in a relationship, even your best friend, is connected for a reason because you like the same things and kind of know each other. I didn’t know he had this interest. I was a bit taken aback.

I admitted to Mrs.Cappellaro that I love love and at its core, to me, this documentary is really a love story. So I wanted to dive into this huge concept of love with her and hear her thoughts on what it means to her, especially in the context of her unique love experience.

Thinking back to when you first met your husband, maybe those initial dates, did you ever imagine he would pursue taking a big risk like this? As a woman navigating romance, did it scare you or make you worry? Or was it something you ended up falling in love with?

Susanna Cappellaro

First of all, thank you so much for your words. It means so much to me that you could see it’s a film about a relationship. The fact that he wants to become a cyborg is the color on top of the relationship. It’s a love story. A story of a marriage. [And] no, not all like zero. That's why I was so shocked. He’s always been a forward-thinking person. I’m very different. I’m always in the moment. Maybe I should have started to think this man is never in the present ever! 

She shares that when they go on walks in the parks, she points out the butterflies, the old lady, the opened roses to smell, while Mr. Cohen is constantly in his head and projecting into the future. In fact, Mr. Cohen founded the first company that distributed digital music in the 90s!

She laughs a bit and recalls how she and her friends would dismiss him. She tells a story about how when she lived back in Milan and was at a friend’s house. Mr. Cohen said, “One day we wouldn't read books, we would read digital books.”  They laughed and said “No, what are you talking about? You’re Satan, Shut up!” Then the Kindle came out, though this was long before the Kindle existed. She chuckles and adds, “He had a pulse for the future yet I never thought he would make himself the Kindle.”

Can love coexist with feelings of anger and resentment towards your partner? How did you overcome these feelings or did you ever?

When you love someone, you let them do what they want. You can’t ever hold them back. If you do, that’s not love. My anger was less for what specifically he was doing but more because he was so entropic by it. He was only focused on that and there was no sharing. I grew up in a family where my mom told me relationships are really hard work. I do believe it is. I can see that somebody else in my situation could be like, "Whatever, I’ll go another way." But for me, we will still go to dinner and laugh and have a good time. In the very important moments in life, he is always there to understand and support me; that never went away, and that held us together. Lockdown made us stay together in the apartment for months, and somehow we found each other again.

I mentioned how it seems like they have a strong foundation, and she agreed, adding that you also create your own foundation. She believes love grows stronger over time, especially as you face challenges together. She also highlighted how people often confuse passion with love. Mrs. Cappellaro mentions passion always fades away but in a relationship, you have to build a strong foundation. 

From my personal experience relationships always lead us to learning new concepts about ourselves, often that we weren't aware of before. Is there something you have learned about yourself during this experience? 

I learned to have resilience and more patience and more understanding than I thought I would have. At the beginning of the cyborg journey, I was more angry, impulsive, and dismissive, but then when I started to understand, be patient, and open my mind, things got better for me, him, and everyone.

Media usually portrays a pretty specific idea of love, especially when it comes to women. How do you hope this film shifts or challenges those traditional views of love, and what role do you think women play in relationships through your story? 

I wanted the film to come out during Valentine’s Day because I do not like the way relationships and women are portrayed in many of the latest traditional romcoms. They pretend to be realistic. I don’t believe in traditional stereotyping. I hope my film and the way I portray a relationship, this case my relationship, will show that people can relate to it more or differently. When I watch romcoms, I can almost never relate. It’s so very idealized. First, they meet cute, there are the obstacles, so very standard. There are similar patterns in life and to all relationships, but I wanted to portray [them] with as much honesty as I could. It’s very difficult to know the concept of truth. Even if I try to be truthful it's my truth.

To add more credibility to Mrs. Cappellaro's documentary she included her friends in the film to add an outsider's perspective. She also wants to share a hard truth with younger viewers or those who haven’t experienced relationships yet: relationships are tough! The idea that love should be like a romcom can be damaging, as it sets unrealistic expectations. Despite the challenges, though, she wants to show that it’s possible to work through difficulties and come to a resolution.

Have you watched the documentary since filming? Do your feelings about it change from when you first started to now? And—would you ever consider becoming a cyborg yourself?

I have. I had to, I didn’t want to. It’s really hard to look back at your life. I don’t think I’ve ever gone, like, cringe, but I did go back and think, "Ahhh" again. What happened, quite interestingly, is that I feel detached. I started filming in late 2016, 8 years ago, but I’ve matured and grown up. Feelings change and the obstacles in the moment really give you strong emotions, and then they’re gone, you barely remember them. It almost feels like they belong to someone else. I did do a little experiment (brief spoiler), but no.

How did your background in those fields inspire this documentary?

It helped quite a lot. The journalist background was incredibly useful for when I was filming interviews and building the documentary because it made me think a lot about being truthful. What am I trying to communicate? What are the important things people are interested in? At the end of it, it’s a manipulated thing because you have a lot of footage and you choose what to stitch together, but I tried to be as honest as possible. The acting, I had to keep at bay. As an actor, you're always aware of yourself. I used it mainly to be clear. When I speak, if I’m recording, I need to be clear to be understood. I tried to be what in acting is called neutral. There’s no character, it's just me. In life. I never wear makeup, so I never wore makeup. I wanted to be, yes, that’s Susanna, that’s her. A documentary should document what’s happening, not manipulate.

And as a first-time independent filmmaker, what were some of the challenges you faced throughout this process?

The challenges are so many and never-ending. I learned the whole process of making a film and what happens after. The rejection is difficult to deal with. I needed more funds and was always rejected. I wanted to work with certain people, but my budget was really low. I was lucky. I know lockdown affected many people. I made the best of it. People are out of work, I have a little money to offer, but I can give work, so I was able to work with some people I really loved. When it came to festivals, I wasn't able to get into any. Everyone dreams of Sundance. They sent me the nicest email. The individual who wrote the email told me everything she loved about the film. She told me they couldn’t accept it because, after lockdown, the film festival was still small. I really hung on to those little things to keep going. Also, finishing the film during lockdown and after there were no networking places to meet sales agents or distributors. I had to ask everybody, “Do you know anyone?’ and knock on so many doors; it's exhausting. There were times I wanted to give up. I almost got into a film festival, but then, at the very last moment, they went with another film. There was this big drama, and I was in tears. I never cry, but the tension was so much. You almost see yourself arriving, and then you don’t, but every time someone loved the film that kept me going.

What advice would you give to someone who wants to do something similar to what you’ve done?

Don’t get frightened when the doors don’t open. There’s so much knocking to do. When I was much younger and started in fashion in Milan, the doors were opening like there was no tomorrow. I thought life was always like that. Be true to yourself. Be mindful, pay attention, and build from all the little signals you can get. Put them all together and build your road. Be prepared for when the door opens to sell yourself.

Lastly, do you have any future projects we should look out for?

I would love to continue doing documentaries. I’m working on a documentary book. In Italy, in the south, there’s a region called Puglia, which is changing very fast because lots of foreigners, but can also be locals, are buying local houses and renovating these properties. 

Mrs. Cappellaro further explains these aren’t homes where people actually live, just houses that get renovated for short stays, known as holiday homes. The region was once full of hard-working people who had to migrate for better opportunities but is now becoming more upscale. She’s noticed that traditions are being lost as the area evolves so quickly. Mrs. Cappellaro describes that these houses before they’re renovated, feel almost “frozen in time.” She wants to document this moment, capturing the essence of the region before it changes forever.

But her dream is to make music documentaries.